Buddha watches over us

We have added Buddha. He is one of the finishing touches to the garden. He has been in our kitchen for three years now, so he was relieved to be back to nature. We got him from a shop on Connecticut Ave. about 4 years ago. Actually, Ralph and William obtained him. Ralph is a ball buster when it comes to getting the price down. I love the peacefulness he brings, I am speaking of the Buddha statue now, along side the tree. William worked today at oiling the teak chairs we got also several years ago. They will be great with the picnic table, which has also been in our kitchen. Life comes along for those who are patient. Actually, it probably comes along for those who aren't patient, as well. Just not as Buddhisticly.
Now, Edvard here is lounging in the kitchen sleeping on his kitchen chair, as well as the smaller seat next to it. Bless his heart.
Oh, and speaking of heart. I went for my cardio-with injection-treadmill-stress test. Whoo, ain't that a fun thing to do, but it all came out well. The doc says things are good. He had pictures to back up his diagnosis.
Which brings me to another poem. Not a long one, but one that I feel to share today. Actually the one I want to share, I just don't feel like typing the whole thing. This one is something I have felt in the past on many different levels of my life. In many ways it is like he said in "The Holy Grail," "Well, I got better." So, it is less of a overbearing feeling, and sometimes an irky feeling that I think of:

I wish I was like everyone else,
For it all seems so natural to them.
They go and go, with out a glitch,
I can't seem to get started.

I do not blame those above or below
Though I do throw questions to the air.
If I were the same, would I be the same?
If they were me, would they be like me?

I think not.
Only I can be me, and so I shall.
Damn those insecurities that life plays us, and move on.
I may not be who I want, but I am getting as close as I can.



The old last lines don't play out as well now as they didn't then. But they were still defiant:

Only I can be me, and so I shall,
Damn the insecurities, and full throttle forward,
I may not win, but I will be a hell-of-a-close second.

Enjoy the pics

Squirrel Bandit

Okay, I do not know if you can see this, but there is a squirrel that has a bone that I am pretty sure Edvard had buried and he/she had recovered it. The squirrel was chowing down on the bone, and I thought I would take pictures. Also, notice that the fence now has railing along the top of the lattice. Matthew and I did that this afternoon while William entertained Edvard on the front sidewalk. The faucet in the beginning of the pictures was at Home Expo today, and reminded me of a dog cartoon face No poetry this time. Enjoy the pics.

cleaning, rabbit, and poem

I wanted to show these photos in a non collective group. The one of me getting my teeth cleaned is one I feel kind of hesitant about because it cost more than I was first quoted and then I couldn't drink coffee or tea for 3 days. Ohh Myyy Gawd, Mary, that was the hardest part. On the cruise we the went on, the teeth cleaning was over half the price. It also didn't quite work on all the teeth. As is said to happen, but it just so happens that the one tooth it most didn't work on is the one next to the crown she put in at a lighter color in preparation of me getting my teeth cleaned. Ah well, life is humorous. As far as Mr Rabbit goes he was just a chillin' at the airport while we waited for the plane. The hat is from the show "Spring Awakening" that we saw in NYC.
It was funny because we were waiting in the airport and I heard a phone ringing in a song of Brooks and Dunne's "Believe". The guy was a big burly dude, a good ole boy. It was just a telling moment. I am not sure why, but many time those moments are full of un-described insight that we just let go. Anyway, the third picture is one I took last night on the way to dinner with our friends Matthew and Anthony. We had a nice time until the conversation became saturated in debate with the repetitive drone about the war. Matthew and William are both debaters (Anthony was in the zone as well) and get into a cycle of point counter point, which is good and healthy for them, but I normally have Shelley there for protection. I was kind of an ass, in the fact that, as I was excusing myself from the table I made the statement that I didn't want them to be debating the the war when I returned. They were kind enough, not to be talking of it when I returned. We then went and had ice cream. I was missing Shelley, though. We will see them tonight to do the placement of Mr Buddha in the garden.
Well, here is another poem that I had wrote a while ago. It was a poem I wrote while we were traveling through England's country side. It was absolutely beautiful, and I was yet young and hopeful. It paints a youths want of the love of beauty and dreams

Come walk with me through the valley green,
Let us taste the weather on our tongues,
As the dampness slowly dissipates with the
rebirth of the sun.
Oh walk with me through the valley green,
Let us jump the fences raised for personal protection,
And roam the the fields and hills man has
helped nature grow.
Come walk with me through the valley green,
And I shall tell you of my dreams,
And shall we walk through yours as well?
For our dreams are like the valley green,
In our dreams, sometimes, we like to walk alone,
But lest we also have each other with whom we can walk
through the valley green,
We can find only limited fare,
So, walk with me, walk with me, and let
us find our valley green.


Enjoy the pics.

flowers and insight

A little scruffy looking as far as the flowers go, but we wanted to get the garden going this year. It was destroyed when we hired "wall guy" 3 years ago to rebuild our backyard wall. He, we later found out, had been taking pain killers for the past two years previous to us hiring him. It turned out that he couldn't finish the job as was agreed upon a first, second, or third time. So, we had to hire someone else who also, as it turned out, couldn't quite finish the job. But with determination from William, and help from Matthew and Shelley, last year we were able to get the wall pretty well complete. Just the top framing along the lattice walling, and we will be hopefully done with it. William did a great job on it. Everything, but the tree was destroyed. We had made it quite clear that the tree was not to be harmed in any way, or else. He did at least get that part right. So we planted the bulbs last year, and just got the rest planted in this year. You will see more of the tree later. In the back of the garden is the lilac bush we got from Zita. The first one that took us three tries was also destroyed by wall guy. We will also get Mr Budha out on the plate in front of the tree.

Okay, here is another real oldie from my past. This one is when I was realizing my sexuality. I was back home from a date with a nice young lady. I had gone into a bathroom that was empty, and one of the stall doors was half way open. But the light above it was out, so it gave it this weird haunting look. When I was home and thinking about the stall I wrote this.

What are you looking at?
I don't know.
What do you expect to see?
Someone.
It's dark.
You're in the dark, not me.
Really?
Come out a little.
Why don't you come in?
I told you, it's dark.
Too dark?
Sorta, yeah.
Whad'da expect?
More!
More than what you see?
Yeah, and that ain't much.
Cut on me?
No! You, what I can see, look fine.
What can you see?
What I would like to have!
Have?
Ok, what I would like to have respond to me.
Come, again?
You're what I would like to believe,
would make me happy.
You see all that in this dark stall of a shadow?
My half-bear form.
Don't you wish I could come in?
No!
What?
I wish you could put light on me,
and light the shadows. What is dark?


I hope you find something in it for yourself. Enjoy the pics, as well.

bathroom and show

These are what I saw on the ship in the bathroom. Lucky me. I didn't notice the face till the last day, but the horn blowin' sailor - mystic ham stomached being was hard to miss.

On another topic; we went to see the new musical. Saving Aimee at the Signature Theater. It was written by Kathy Lee Gifford. It had some great voices, and some songs that let them use them, as well. And that is my review. Enjoy the pics.

A thought created, a thought dreaded

Years ago I got a picture from Zita that was of a broken ship on a stormy sea and there were a few men hanging on the the timber still floating. It was a Russian Print. I loved that one. And I still wish to see the original someday. This picture reminds me of the print, and the poem I just wrote helps deliver the thoughts that live in me. Some how enjoy the pics just isn't apprapo, but here you go.


In this time of belief we hear the pain
We see the reports of those that have died
Do you feel the true pain or block it and hide
How does one know the way to go through the process
I don't want to really see the want and feel the hurt
I want to say that I am sorry for those who are suffering
and ask people to know I can relate
But can I really relate
Can I really say that I am in it with them
No. Not really. Does that make me cold or wrong?
I am deadened to truth and surrealistic about the horror
I have put up my walls and don't want to expose myself
I am an island that is still afloat at this time
Do not carry burdens to me that I cannot bare
I will help those I can in ways I can
But God bless those who cannot hide
and God bless those who will not lie.
For I am neither and I am both

Poems and pictures

When I came back from the trip little did I know that spring was still so far away. Though I did manage to get some floral shots. The trees are so clean. I love the little pink bud still rolled up with all the others wide open around them. I hope there are some warm days left out there. Not hot, but warm. I have another poem to deliver on the web. This one is much older than the one I wrote for the competition. Both are very profound in the fact that they are about women that have been in a man's life. This one I wrote 18 years ago while I was in college to finish up my B.F.A. I was sitting in Music appreciation early Monday morning, and the teacher was playing Debussy's "Afternoon of the Faun." It was absolutely beautiful. It is still one of my favorites to this day, or night as it is right now. Anyway, I hope you like it. I still like revisiting it every now and then.

We laid upon the southern terms of time,
The colors were a blending of envy and fire,
And some might have been so inclined,
if knowing of our pleasures.
The green still predominantly hanging on,
Never totally losing dominance against the changes,
For the Southern Term lives on.

We felt the natural breath blowing against our skin,
The soft kisses caressing our curves of freedom.
The sun crept through the leaves still hanging,
clinging, or bound to remain in the trees.
It's warmth more seen on our skin than felt,
The direct rays not so attributed for the comfort,
as much as the general glow that surrounds us.

Like Fauns of ancient Greece we lay,
No hurry, no recognition of time, no somberness of responsibility,
A quick cool breeze, a switch of previous exhales from nature,
titillating the want of moving closer,
Then a following stroke proves warm again,
but we do not release the embrace.

Enjoy the pics.

A poem, a picture, and a thought

I know there are a lot of pictures out there waiting to be seen, but this was the one to be viewed at this time. We made baskets to be delivered. It was fun. William snuck over early in Easter morning and left them outside the neighbor doors. We were grateful that we were able to do it. It was a fun time with the Graeme man. he has grown even more. And his demeanor is quite good for a teen ager dealing with an aging gay uncle driving him around for apparel shopping. We tried to make 'THE LAST WHIMSY" But I failed horribly at that driving to the right spot on time. but I think we did okay. We made some ice cream tonight. Oh my god it is so good.

I also found my Xmas competition poem. It mentions breast, and is totaling a weird idea, but I thought it was a cool concept. I am still not quite sure what the marks against it were, but please comment if you care to does so. Thanks

From the start of our lively being we desire and grow in love’s attention
For we suckle on that first breast and nurture in its abundant fair
But how then is it taken, covered, buttoned and never again pulled to us bare
So is it not in that first love, that we find the love’s first shun
Oh woe is that mind that is left wallowing in that sallowing run
Sure we adapt, to go find alternate finger, or cone, but none do compare
For there is just that one that was to come so sweetly by God’s care
How can we then allow it to be worshipped by a younger sibling one
Cry out Ye Magistrates cry out a loud
For tis a crimer and a shamer that we must review
How do we know that God is meaning all that is allowed
Do we not still need that which is given and then repewed
But in even that thought there is this thought for the crowd stated
With that first shun we learn that love is so much more than what is just viewed and tasted.

Yes, a little odd and trivial, perhaps, but the writing is good. And the rhythm pretty good. Sure I made up a word, or two. But hey, artistic license is a hazard of the trade. Thanks. Enjoy the pic and the poem.